Question:

“Should family and friends use the same hair salon?”
-Anonymous

Answers:

“Not unless you really want to look like your mother. ”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“Sure why not. Unless you have a family of gossipers and know it all’s … then I would say no. Steer clear of that mess.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

“Wow… Same hair salon? Why not? I mean, what’s the real question, here? Is it a conflict of interest because one family member is in a relationship with a hairdresser? Is it a question of class/taste? This is a question that should probably not be taken at face value, I think.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

“Is this a competition? Who can get the better deal? Or maybe this has something to do with talking trash… and you are afraid of being a gritty gossiper behind your friend or family’s back? Then you should perhaps watch your p’s and q’s… and only talk to your garbage container at home… it won’t tell.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Giggle Box

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Tags: hair, hair salon, salon

Question:

“When do you think is the right time to start promoting a film?”
-Anonymous

Answers:

“Promote the film AFTER you finish it. That way you don’t have to field awkward questions at parties such as, “So, whatever happened with that film you made a MySpace page for 3 years ago?””
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“Start promoting a film as soon as possible. Build interest early. Keep the public & fans updated on the films status as often as it’s feasible for you to do so. Also be sure to network, make contacts! You never know what skill set or network will be beneficial to you and the success of your film.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

“Heck, if it’s a good script and you have shot some good screens with nice eye candy that’ll appeal to the masses, I say NOW is a good time to promote it. Of course, all things are relative and it’s a great idea to get some opinions on the film’s quality and value before you start inundating people with how great a possibly crappy film will be. I’ve seen some movies go straight from post production to DVD release without ever having gone to movie theater viewing. Of course, most of these movies never would have brought the crowds of, say, Star Wars Episode III and The Lord of the Rings Trilogy”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

“Depending on how long it takes for the film to be made, you could be promoting it for five years! Maybe it’s better to start promoting once the film is wrapped. This way you’ll have a nearly finished product to promote and people will stay excited about it. Instead of saying, “Man, you’ve been talking about this for years! Didn’t that film already come out about 2 years ago??” – And you embarrassingly have to say. “Um… no”.
— Gritty Gossiper: Giggle Box

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Tags: film, film promotion, movie, movie promotion, promotion

Question:

“Why is ignorance so prevalent in popular culture?? When I myself have met many celebs to see it’s only an act?”
-Anonymous

Answers:

“Ah… ignorance is popular because most ‘common’ people are ignorant in some way or another and they like people who they can relate to. So, it’s cool to be ignorant, right? Seriously, with the information overload most folks experience in day to day life, it’s easy to be ignorant about most things. It’s not a really bad thing unless it’s something you have a strong (yet uninformed) opinion on. I avoid this problem by smartly having a strong opinion about nothing, at all.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

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Tags: Celebrities, Celebrity, Celebs

Question:

“Is E.T. the father of Palin’s grandchild?”
-Anonymous

Answers:

“I’m pretty sure that we never saw a penis on ET. Even though I was in third grade, I was looking. Because I had problems… that never went away.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“No but E.T. video taped the whole dirty deed and will be glad to sell a copy to you for $2. Also available in HD for an extra $1.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

“Personally, I could care less if the Runt was fathered by Geico’s Gecko. If the worse of Sarah Palin’s “baggage” is that she happens to be the mom of a teenager that got herself into trouble, she’ll do well under the scrutiny of America”
— Gritty Gossiper: Dad Pitt

“Actually, from what I’ve been able to find, this rumor of a grandchild is untrue, unless you count the one who’s due in December. I understand that her now 17-year-old daughter, Bristol, is an expecting mother, and planning to be wed to the father of her child, so I can only speculate that it couldn’t possibly be E.T., because let’s face it, he’s cute for a while, but who would want to be married to him? He had a gut back in the day… just imagine his wrinkly body today… short legs… long neck… beer gut out to who knows where. I do think it interesting that it’s hard to find a legitimate source identifying who the father to be is, though.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

“I think it would be hard to tell if E.T. fathered Palin’s grandchild now as E.T. phoned home and I don’t think he will be coming back… so no paternity tests can be done.
— Gritty Gossiper: Giggle Box

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Tags: E.T., Father, Gecko, Geico, Palin, Video

Question:

“Should you tell family members your income?”
-Anonymous

Answers:

“Do NOT tell your family your income unless they make more than you, then feel free to blab away. Hey, they have some cash to spare! They should know that you only make enough for two BMW’s. Your life is rough!”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“Depends on the type of relationship you have with your family.

Usually, I recommend it’s better not to fully disclose what your income is. This would only be recommended in order to avoid jealousy and potential conflicts.

If your family lives with you and it’s a co-dependent relationship (i.e . sharing the cost of living etc). Then it’s okay to talk about income.

At the same time, they should be open and communicative with you about their income.

Only you know what your family’s situation is and whether or not revealing that information is necessary to maintain the well being of your families economic situation.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

“All depends.  Can you trust your family members?  Do they care what you make?  Are they interested in helping you with some investment strategy or business plan?  If the IRS, a group of complete strangers, are good enough to know your income, then why not your loved ones?  I mean, if you know what line of work your family-member is in and where in the country they live, you can pretty much go to a government web site on employment statistics and look up how much they are probably making.  Nothing is private if someone really wants to know.  I think, generally, you shouldn’t have to have secrets from siblings, such as income, but on the flipside, you shouldn’t brag that you’re making a killing in real estate or debt short-selling, either, especially when a family member is having a tough time with the economy the way it is.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

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Tags: BMWs, Family, Income

Question:

“What would we have to do in order to get you to drive to LA to see our show at Viper on October 4th? We’ll start the negotiation with one home-burned CD, a turkey sandwich, and a Neccesitamos Mas Cowbell T-shirt?
- http://www. myspace. com/austincowbell”

Answers:

“Buy me a car. I like European cars right now. And I’m partial to red. ”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“Those are all fine and dandy offerings, but with the price of gas and me down here in the Caribbean, somewhere near Florida, I think, that’d be a looooooong, pricey drive. I don’t think I’ll be finding my way out to LA anytime soon, sorry. ”
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

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Tags: Austin, Car, Cowbell, European Cars, Music, Red

Question:

“What is inside of the microwave bag?”
— Anonymous

Answers:

“The inside of a popcorn bag is like Paris Hilton’s crotch. Hot, promising, and yellow.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

“Usually it’s popcorn inside the microwave bag.”
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

Methinks microwaveable food is what’s inside the microwave bag. I mean, what else could there possibly be? Is this truly a ‘gossip’ question? I think not. Oh, and let’s not just assume were talking about a microwaveable popcorn bag because we all know what’s in there… burnt kernels when it’s done in my microwave! (Yeah, pirates have those, too)
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

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Tags: bag, microwave, microwave bag, Paris Hilton

Question:

“How do you handle a female in your work force that is the boss’s spy?”
— Anonymous

Answers:

“Be her best friend, never gossip and always be on time. At least when she’s around…”
— Gritty Gossiper: Writer’s Cramp

Completely “shut her out”. Don’t give her any avenues or opportunities to gather information from you. If you have to deal with her on a daily basis, be formal & polite, but don’t include her in any of your social activities.
— Gritty Gossiper: Lady Fierce

There are really a few possibilities to consider for this particular question…

1. Are you the boss? Often, I am (as you can see by my name; Boss Pirate), so in this case, the female in question would be under my employ. That being the case, I’d manage her as any wise boss would, and work to ensure that she appears to the rest of the crew to be as alienated with me as they, so she can properly blend in. Of course, I’d also have to ensure she’s attractive so as to better get the rest of the crew’s guard down. Lastly, I’d ensure that she is only planted within the workforce for as long as needed to find the desired information, whatever that may be.

2. Is she a peer/co-worker? If she’s a peer, you can take her under your wing, gain her confidence, and feed her some interesting and useless slew about the boss or better yet, turn her against the one she’s spying for. The world LOVEs double-agents.

3. Is she subordinate to you, but ’secretly’ working for your boss? Well in this case, simply firing her is probably not the answer, but if you have direct control of her, you can easily give her the worst tasks in the workplace and ensure she never gets the information the boss seeks.

4. Now, if you’re the candid type who keeps no secrets, well the answer is really easy. Start by telling the boss what you really think, both about the job and the perception such an action as planting a female spy gives the honest, hard-working employees you work with.

Of course, I’m assuming away the possibility that she’s ‘HAWT’. If that’s the case, then all the male employees will probably ogle her constantly, the female employees will hate her because she makes them look less desirable, and the boss will defeat all best intentions in planting her within the work force because productivity will probably decline significantly as a result.
— Gritty Gossiper: Boss Pirate

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Tags: Activities, Boss, Female, Friend, Gossip, Office, Social, Spy, Work